Life after cancer

 

Kaleidoscope by inkspired and KaleidoCam 

It’s been just over 2 years now since my first cancer diagnosis. 25 months. Life circumstances have certainly turned me topsy-turvy, upside-down and every which way in between. Some days I question who I am. Am I still me?

Of course, yes, I am. But yet, somehow, different. I think that’s a good thing. I never want to remain in a holding pattern - stagnate. Never changing. I think change is good. God gave me an active, creative brain and I need to use it - or lose it! (Aren’t idioms fun?). I think the difference now is that the core me is still me, but so many new events have shaped and changed my perceptions, opinions and reactions. Different things are more important now.

Cancer cannot change the innermost me. I will not allow it to define who I am. Cancer likes to be center stage. It is an attention hog. Cancer wants nothing else to compete with it. It likes to dictate all of my reactions, my thoughts, my focus. Nope. Not gonna’ happen.

You see, I have a God Who loves me. Me! I have done nothing to deserve this love. Yet God tells me over and over and over that He loves me;  that He cares about me, and that no matter what or who or when He will stay beside me.

Wow.

God also tells me (through His Word, the Bible) that He is a jealous God. I am to have no other gods above Him. He is my one and only priority. This is not what cancer tries to tell me. Cancer may not love me but by golly I better think of nothing else but it. It shouts! It shoves! It demands! Good news? I have a choice of what to listen to.

And that is what love truly is. It gives me a choice. God’s love does not tie me down or force me to do ‘good things’ or to think only one way. God’s love has set me free from fear, free from bullying, free from shame and worry. God has accepted me just as I am. He loves me. Me - flaws and all.

Cancer has changed me. I am not saying I am the same as I was even 3 years ago. My focus perhaps has changed. I hope I have changed for the better. My desire to be more like Jesus has deepened. I definitely have more of a sense of urgency. My life line feels shorter. Much more finite. That ‘I’m going to live forever’ view from my twenties is gone. Absolutely gone. I do not know how much time I have left on this earth. I am okay with that. Even though I have always known that I do not know when death might take me, it seems more personal now.

God has numbered my days since before I was born. What a concept! It’s hard to wrap my head around that one. Yet it is so comforting. My life will never be ‘cut short’. My death will never be a shame as I was taken too early. I will have lived the exact number of days that God had planned for me since the beginning of time. What I do with those days - now that’s a different matter!

So I return to cancer. Has it interrupted my life? Will it cut short my days here on earth? Will I survive cancer? The answer for me must be No! No! and No! Cancer does not have the power to determine my days. It does not have the power to cut short my life. I will not survive it, as it could never cause my death to begin with. Has it interrupted my life? No! With God’s love guiding me, what I can do is go through cancer, just as I have gone through some dark tunnels before this. I could not see the end in some of those tunnels, and I certainly could not see the rocks I tripped over inside of them. As all tunnels are however, there has always been a light up ahead. I was never alone, and I am not alone now. There has always been a light guiding me forward. Encouraging me, telling me if I keep my eyes on that light I will reach the end of that tunnel. There is always a light if I believe in a God Who has said He will never leave me. Never abandon me. Never leave me alone.

Cancer tries to tell me I am alone. It is the only focus and the only purpose I can possibly have. Nothing else matters. Cancer is wrong. It is a mere blip on my screen. My focus must only be  on glorifying God. Hasn’t that been my goal all along? My life’s purpose? To become more like Jesus is not just a religious buzz phrase. It is who I am. Cancer is not in that equation. 

Some days I let life lose that focus. Those are my ‘bad’ days. I wanted to do -fill-in-the-blank-. I can’t do ____ because cancer made me weak. Tired. Cancer made me…and therein is the problem. I have allowed cancer to become the loudest voice in my head. Fortunately I am a child of a very patient God. Very patient. I will wallow in self-pity (usually never for more than a day) before that inner voice says “SNAP OUT OF IT!”. 

I wanted to let you know how I am physically after 2 years of cancer travel. Funny that what became uppermost in my mind has been my attitude readjustment. Maybe not so surprising however. Things of the spirit are always more important than physical things. God tells us that often enough in the New Testament (Bible). Perhaps that sums up me. Who I am now, after traveling the cancer path for a time. Is cancer done with me? I have no idea. What I do know is that it will never be the boss of me. It will never dictate who I am - unless I let it. While I may skip off the correct path for a few feet, I never want to stay on that path of selfishness and self-destruction. My eyes must remain on my God.

Life after cancer? Why, my life has remained, and will remain, in the hands of God. Cancer has just been a reminder lesson of how much God loves me, and of what is truly important in this brief journey I have here on earth. I really can’t wait to see what God has planned for me next!

- inkspired

“For God loved me so much that He gave His one and only Son, that if I believe in Him I will not die but have everlasting life.”

- John 3:16, New Testament, Bible 

“…and we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”

- Romans 8:28, New Testament, Bible

“For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus, our Lord.”

- Romans 8:38-39, New Testament, Bible

Daniel Boone, American Frontiersman

Nihkwe

 (‘Welcome’ in Shawnee language)

..Hunter…Soldier…Husband…

…..Trapper…..Thief….Trailblazer…

..Coroner….Land Speculator…Sheriff…

Slave Owner…Horse Trader…Tracker…

..Wagon Driver…Blacksmith….Father…

…Murderer…Explorer…Surveyor…

…Criminal…..Teamster…Quaker…

…Indian Killer...Storyteller…Poacher..

…General Assemblyman……

…Grandfather…..Traitor…Folk Hero..

…Prisoner of War…..Bear Killer…

..Tavern Keeper…..Backwoodsman…

…Politician…..Christian…

…Avenger…..Frontiersman…

…Adopted Son of Shawnee…

By Chester Harding, 1820

Who was Daniel Boone?

He’s been called all of the above names, and probably a lot more.

Daniel Boone was born 6th of 11 children in 1734 in Berks County, Pennsylvania; into a Quaker family.  They all lived in an 1 room cabin. America was a British colony at that time.

Frontier Culture Museum, Staunton, Virginia

Example of 1 room cabin

He had little formal education, but was taught by siblings how to read and write.

His family was content to have him learn how to hunt and trap from local settlers and Indians*.

By the age of 15 he was known as the region’s best hunter.

Berks County, Pennsylvania

In 1750 his family moved to North Carolina, leaving the Quaker faith at the same time. (2 of his siblings had married outside of the Quaker community, causing the Boones to be kicked out).

Cree Indians, North Carolina, 1895

In 1754 the French & Indian War broke out between the French and the British with Indian allies on both sides. It would continue to 1763, with the British winning substantial territory. Daniel joined the North Carolina militia (British). In 1755 there was a significant battle called the Battle of Monongahela where the British were soundly defeated. Daniel returned home and in 1756 he married neighbor Rebecca Bryan.

The Wounding of General Braddock, The Battle of Monongahela;

Artist unknown

*while the current politically correct term is indigenous people, or First Americans, during Daniel Boone’s time period it was ‘Indian’. I have chosen to use the term he would have used.

Daniel and Rebecca had 10 children:

1756 Levina

1757 James

1759 Israel 

1760 Susannah

1762 Jemima

1768 Rebecca

1769 Daniel Morgan

1773 Jesse Bryan

1775 William

1781 Nathan

In addition, they raised 8 children orphaned from other relatives.

Wow. That’s a lot of kids!

Friend’s magazine

Daniel Boone continued to support his family by hunting and trapping. He would go on ‘long hunts’ which were extended trips that lasted for weeks or months at a time. He would go alone or with a small group of men, following bison migration trails. He would return with deer skins, and beaver and otter pelts to sell to fur traders.

Side note:

He never wore a ‘coon cap’ and in fact disliked them and thought they were uncomfortable. He DID wear caps made from beaver.

  During this time the French & Indian War brought a lot of anxiety and uncertainty, not to mention danger. He brought his family to the Yadkin Valley, North Carolina after peace was made with the Cherokee Indians. He continued hunting, trapping and land speculation. In 1769 a friend convinced him to go on a long hunt through the Cumberland Gap.

Pinnacle Overlook, Cumberland National Park; photo cred: Jessica N. Reynolds 

That same year Henderson and Company hired Daniel to explore the Bluegrass Region of Kentucky.

In 1773 he pulled up stakes, sold his land to pay debts, and moved his family to Kentucky to establish a settlement.

Overlooking the Kentucky River

In the Fall of 1773 Daniel Boone’s first-born son, James (age 16) was leading a small party of settlers and slaves to meet up with a main group on their way to the main encampment of settlers. They were attacked by a mixed party of Cherokee and Shawnee (and possibly Delaware) and all but 3 were brutally massacred. Ultimately only 2 survived to tell of the ordeal.

“I Think We Have Company”; artist: Robert Griffing

Cherokee/Delaware Indian

In 1775 Daniel started leading settlers through The Wilderness Road that ran through the Cumberland Gap into the region of future Kentucky.

He was not the first to ‘discover’ or use the Cumberland Gap, but he made it popular by guiding settlers through it.

Gateway to the West; Artist: David Wright

That same year Daniel built Fort Boonesborough, the 1st fortified settlement in Kentucky of English speaking peoples, west of the Appalachian Mountains.

Although unrest had been building for several years, the Revolutionary War broke out in 1775 and would last until 1783, with American colonists fighting for independence and what they considered unfair taxation from Great Britain.

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Daniel Boone became a militia officer for the colonists. History repeats with different Indian tribes siding with one or the other of the primary combatants, depending on what was promised to them.

War Chief Dragging Canoe, Southern Cherokee, Revolutionary War

Artist: David Wagonner

In 1776 Daniel’s daughter, 13 year old Jemima, decided to take a break from camp with a couple of friends. Together with the Calloway sisters, aged 16 and 14, she ‘borrowed’ a canoe and went floating down the river. They were kidnapped by a group of Cherokee/Shawnee Indians. 3 days later Daniel Boone and a party of rescuers caught up with the kidnapping Indian party and returned the girls home safely. 

The Abduction of Daniel Boone’s Daughter by Indians

Artist: Charles Wimar, 1855

This incident became the basis for James Fenimore Cooper’s fiction novel “The Last of the Mohicans”, 1826. It also became a popular subject for paintings and illustrations.

Photo of Jemima Boone Calloway and her family, decades later

The Life of Daniel Boone by Cecil Hartley, 1865

In early 1778 Daniel Boone and a party of men were gathering salt at a place called Blue Licks. Daniel was captured by a party of Shawnee Indians and British militia. He learned they were on their way to attack the Fort. Daniel devised a plan where he promised the war party he and the salt gatherers would give up peacefully to the Shawnee, declare allegiance to King George, and Daniel would lead the Shawnee in the Spring to capture Fort Boonesborough.

Back at the Fort news of the capture spread. After many months and hearing nothing of the men, it was assumed all had died. Many families, including Rebecca and the children, relocated back to North Carolina.

Movie Poster

Later one of the kidnapped salt gathering men escaped and made it back to the Fort, convincing those there that Daniel was colluding with the British and had turned traitor, according to what he had seen and heard in the Indian encampment.

Apparently Daniel was a good actor.

Photograph of a Shawnee warrior

During this time it is said that Daniel was adopted by a Shawnee Chief, possibly Chief Blackfish, and given the Shawnee name “Sheltowee” or Big Turtle. Months passed before Daniel was able to make an escape and travel back to Fort Boonesborough to warn them of the pending attack. Arriving there, he was declared a traitor and placed under court martial, based upon the testimony of a few previously released prisoners. Daniel was able to give convincing enough arguments to refute this charge, and rallied the remaining settlers into defending the Fort against the oncoming Spring Indian raid.

He was promoted to an officer in the Virginia militia, helping defend Fort Boonesborough against overwhelming numbers of enemy attackers. Afterwards 

Daniel reunited with his family, and the Boones moved to Missouri.

Daniel Boone’s home, Defiance, St. Charles County, Missouri

Daniel continued to fight as a militia officer; hunted and trapped to help support his family, and dealt with land permits and purchases. Once, on his way to purchase land permits with money from settlers, he was robbed. Many settlers demanded that Daniel repay them their lost $$, and when he couldn’t some even sued him. During this time he also lost several members of his family, both close and extended. 

In 1780 his 5 year old son, William, became ill and died while out on the trail with the family. Another son and a nephew were killed in the Battle of Blue Licks, Revolutionary War; with a couple of his brothers killed there as well. His last child, Nathan, was born in 1781.

The Paris Peace Treaty of 1783 ended the Revolutionary War with the American colonists achieving independence from Great Britain.

After their loss, the British abandoned their Indian allies to their own fate. Shawnee/Cherokee Chief Tecumseh continued his fight against the encroaching white settlers.

‘These lands are ours. No one has the right to remove us. The Master of Life has appointed this place for us to light our fires and here we shall remain.’

- Chief Tecumseh

 Chief Tecumseh was killed in the War of 1812. This effectively ended any attempts of uniting Indian tribes together against the white settlers. Almost all tribes were then relocated to reservations on extremely limited lands in harsh conditions.

Shawnee/Cherokee Chief Tecumseh 

1784 saw the publication of John Filson’s book about Daniel Boone. The folk hero was born.

“Many heroic actions and chivalrous adventures are related of me which exist only in the regions of fancy.”

- Daniel Boone

In 1786 a large number of Shawnee were captured and imprisoned. Daniel Boone housed, fed and treated humanely the prisoners until they were sent to reservations.

After all, he was Sheltowee - Big Turtle.

John Two Moons, Northern Cheyenne

In the next few years Daniel tried many different occupations to support his large family. Hunting and trapping were harder to do with the influx of more and more people. Daniel was a tavern owner, land surveyor, horse trader, land speculator, and county coroner.

The problem was, he wasn’t very good at any of them.

Movie Poster

1795 saw the Treaty of Greenville end the Northwest Indian War. After two decades or so of vicious attacks and counter-attacks by all sides, enmity was put to rest. Maybe. Britain was worried about land in the north (Canada), Indians were rapidly losing tribal lands and hunting grounds and more and more settlers were pouring into the area wanting their very own slice of heaven.

Daniel Boone moved his family to Missouri, again. Things were getting crowded. He had tried three terms as an assemblyman, and tried his hand at being a sheriff. All he really wanted to do was hunt and trap.

‘Returning a Favor’ artist: Lee Teter

In 1813 his wife Rebecca Bryan Boone died.

There are no images of her. She was born into a Quaker family and most likely kept many of the simple Quaker traditions.
She was a true pioneer woman who raised 18 children, much of it by herself. From narratives by her children and neighbors she could equally skin a deer, chop firewood, grow flax and shear sheep to sew clothing and grow and maintain crops and a vegetable garden.

She was 75 years old when she died, and had been married for 56 years.

1830 Quaker woman’s dress and cloak.

He volunteered to fight in the War of 1812, at age 78. (He was rejected due to old age). Daniel was becoming crippled with arthritis, and hunting and trapping became more difficult. Not that that stopped him from going hunting.

He moved in with his son Nathan and daughter-in-law Olive.

Most likely a family photograph of Nathan Boone’s family

September 26, 1820 Daniel Boone passed away of natural causes, in son Nathan’s home. His legendary status as an American Folk Hero continued to grow.

Numerous books, poems, movies, TV series, paintings and stories grew his legacy to epic proportions.

Fess Parker, TV series

Would he have approved?

I think he would have chuckled over the stories, told a few whoppers of his own to his grandchildren, and sat back and enjoyed the show.

He was, after all,

Daniel Boone.

‘Til next time,

inkspired

A few of the websites I visited while researching for this blog, in no particular order:

study.com

native-languages.org

libquotes.com

crimereads.com

Answers.com

Wikipedia

Californiasar.org

teachingAmericanhistory.org

ncdanielboonetrail.org

Pinterest 

Tennesseeencyclopedia.net

Americanrevolutioninstitute.org

Biography.com

History.com

thefamouspeople.com

notablebiographies.com

Britannica.com

Red, the color of…

 Welcome!

All kaleidoscopes by inkspired and KaleidoCam 

The rose is red, the violet’s blue,

The honey’s sweet, and so are you.

Thou art my love and I am thine,

I drew thee to my valentine:

The lot was cast and then I drew,

And fortune said it should be you.

- 1784

Red:

Passion

Intense 

Dominant

Primary

Brilliant

A Lady red - amid the Hill

Her annual secret keeps!

A Lady white, within the Field

In placid Lily sleeps!

The tidy Breezes, with their Brooms -

Sweep vale - and hill - and tree!

Prithee, my pretty Housewives!

Who may expected be?

The Neighbors do not yet suspect!

The Woods exchange a smile!

Orchard and Buttercup, and Bird -

In such a little while!

And yet, how still the Landscape stands!

How nonchalant the Hedge!

As if the “Resurrection”

Were nothing very strange!

- 1879, Emily Dickinson

Red Maple tree

rooi - Afrikaans

rood - Dutch

rojo  - Spanish

ado’m - Hebrew

Summer Tanager; photo cred: Tara Tanaka

rouge - French

bomvu - Zulu

rot - German

czerwony - Polish

hongse` - Chinese

crven - Croatian

ppalgan - Korean

sur - Pashto

‘Mermaid’s Night on the Town’ recycled junk mail collage by inkspired

dearg - Irish

aka - Japanese

d’o - Vietnamese

cherven - Bulgarian 

Vestiaire Collective

1920’s evening gown

Build-Your-Own-Art; Mercuri

ahmar - Arabic

merah  - Indonesian

nyekundu - Swahili

rasu - Romanian

Robert Vivier, Nordstrom’s 

Sandra Oh, Screen Guild Actor’s Awards

ghermez - Farsi

krasny - Russian

laal - Hindu

sarkans - Latvian

Barbie paper doll

‘My love is like a red, red rose

That’s newly sprung in June;

O my love is like the melody

That’s sweetly played in tune…’

- Robert Burns, possibly adapting an existing folk song

1937 Cord 810 Beverly 

punainen - Finnish

lal - Bengali

raudonas - Lithuanian

daeng - Thai

NYC Dance Project; photo cred: Ken Browar & Deborah Ory

Recycled postage stamp art by inkspired

Godinger, Macy’s

vermelho - Portuguese

sivappu - Tamil

sur - Pashto

rout - Luxembourgish

kirmizi - Turkish

chervonyy - Ukranian

pula - Filipino

rato - Nepalese

Virtual Paperdolls

Red Dragon Beta; credit: Jirawat Plekhongthu

The Red Wheelbarrow

‘so much depends

upon

a red wheel

barrow

glazed with rain

water

beside the white

chickens’

- William Carlos Williams

1883-1963

one of the principal poets of the Imagist movement

by inkspired

Vintage advertisement 

Vintage advertisement 

merah - Malay

coch - Welsh

casaan - Somalian

piros  - Hungarian

Chinese cinnabar 

‘Now sleeps the crimson petal, now the white;

Nor waves the cypress in the palace walk;

Nor winks the gold fin in the porphyry font.

The firefly wakens; waken thou with me…’

- Lord Alfred Tennyson

A Persian form of poetry called ghazal,

a form of love poetry usually sung.

Ali Express

Zappos

Painted rock cottage by inkspired

BagForLove

Painted rock by inkspired

I hope you have enjoyed this little venture into the color red as much as I have enjoyed putting it together.

‘Til next time,

inkspired

A few of the websites I visited for this blog, in no particular order:

Pinterest

interestingliterature.com

Reddit.com

lexiglobe.com